Sitting at the Adult Table

Dear Mosaic Family,

Thanksgiving and family is an interesting thing. I love Thanksgiving because it gives me an opportunity to catch up with family I see about once a year (or less). But what's most interesting about Thanksgiving is the politics. And I don't mean the constant barrage of political news we get every week. I mean, who gets to sit at the adult table. How many of you guys grew up with at least two tables at Thanksgiving?

In our family, there is a “kids” table and an “adults” table. I use quotes because those labels were always applied loosely. What I came to find out was that you got a seat at the adult table if you were a child who sat in a high chair or you were married. There is a Thanksgiving purgatory from age three to married. Today, you can be 25 and unmarried and you’re still at the kids' table!

But, one special Thanksgiving I rallied to be at the adult table. You see, I had a special place in the family. I was the first born grandchild. And I intended to use my privilege in the most un-noble way possible… for my own advancement.

I lobbied all the influencers in the family, put down a few references, and handed in my application to sit at the adult table. Eventually, I was told I could sit at the adult table as long as I acted grown-up. I had to sit in my seat, keep my voice at a certain volume, put my napkin in my lap, eat with a fork and knife, and engage in conversations about... actual politics (Which was going to be no problem because I was a master at working the system after successfully sitting at the adult table). While it was fun to pretend to be an adult at 9, at 32 it’s hard to be an actual adult… sometimes I find myself longing to sit back at the kids' table.

We’ve all experienced something similar. There comes a time where we want a seat at the adult table of life, but it’s going to require us to grow up. There is no pretending in real life. The adult table is painful and not always a lot of fun, but in the end, we realize that life actually works better when we grow up. Staying a kid forever will cause you and everyone around you a lot of pain.

Tomorrow's passage in Colossians 3 is a passage that requires us to grow up. It’s painful to hear a lot of what Paul’s saying, but in the end, we realize it’s a beautiful design that God has ordained in the family. We'll look at growing up in marriage, raising kids, and work.


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